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Review of Funny People

Posted by DrFunke on August 6, 2009

The night after I saw “Funny People” one of my family members went to see it as well. When she asked me how it was, I said “Leave after about an hour and a half.” In retrospect, this is what made the movie merely pretty good as opposed to really really great (which it could’ve been). The movie is really great, all the way up to the moment where Sandler and Rogen get in a car to go see Sandler’s ex-fiance.

There were a lot of positives. I absolutely loved the writing. It was a ballsy move to make such a dark comedy, and at times this movie uses everyone’s fear of death and mortality to create some hilarious moments. Some of the stand-up scenes were pretty entertaining, though some of it wasn’t too good. The characters and dialogue all felt real, which is something that Apatow movies execute surprisingly and consistently well.

One thing that really surprised me was how good the acting was. I don’t really like Seth Rogen’s acting, but he did well in his role as Ira, basically a struggling comic who starts working with his idol (Sandler’s character, George Simmons) and is completely awestruck being around the guy. Jonah Hill was awesome as always, Jason Schwartzmann’s character was damn funny, and a lot of the random supporting characters provided great moments. There were plenty of cameos from famous people, but none beat James Taylor and Eminem. I can’t believe I just wrote that sentence. Leslie Mann and Eric Bana both acted really well, the only problem is that their characters basically ruined the fucking movie.

Adam Sandler was absolutely phenomenal. He absolutely nailed the role, which makes me think that in real life it’s very possible that he’s just kind of a grumpy selfish asshole. But every scene, whether being scared of dying, whether joking around with Rogen, or whether trying to re-kindle his romance with his ex, Sandler was just great. He genuinely brought a lot of depth to a character that couldn’t have worked without it. Part of the interesting thing about his character is that it’s really just “what if Adam Sandler never got married and was dying?” There’s a lot about Sandler’s character no longer doing stand-up and just doing a whole bunch of crappy kids movies to make money, and how that leaves him feeling unfulfilled with his life and career when he realizes he may be dying. Again, he couldn’t have been better.

Oddly enough, I thought the funniest part of the movie was by far the first 2 or 3 minutes. Judd Apatow and Sandler were actually roommates in New York something like 20 years ago before either of them had done anything of note or achieved any kind of fame. Apatow apparently filmed a bunch of the things they did, and some of those tapes were Sandler making prank phone calls. I nearly peed in my pants. I can’t remember the last time I laughed that hard at anything, and since it was 2 minutes straight I thought I was going to break a rip. It was just one of those moments that reminded you why, for a while, he wasn’t Adam Sandler making dumb kids’ movies. He was Adam Motherfucking Sandler, one of the most hilarious people on the face of the earth. In all honesty, that first sequence makes the movie more than worth it.

I liked this movie. The problem is that the last 45 minutes or so were just not entertaining. I spent the whole time looking at my phone like I was waiting to get out of class. There were barely any laughs, and the whole romance arc was just not necessary at all. Really, it was just so unexpected that it ended up taking away from how good the movie is before that. Either way, I’d still say “Funny People” lives up to it’s name, and is definitely worth watching.

Final Grade: B

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Guest Movie Review-Transformers

Posted by Mac10 on June 24, 2009

My little brother went to go see Transformers last night. Since it would take an order from Sir Nick himself to get me to see it, I will let him review the movie for you.

Transformers 2: Revenge of the Galactically Stupid

Last night I was roped into seeing the new Transformers movie for the midnight showing. I continually protested to my friends that I did not wish to see anything that has Michael Bay anywhere near it, unless of course it’s The Rock (which is only good because of one man: Sir Nick Cage.) My friends told me they would team up and gang rape me if I didn’t go, so in the interest of my asshole, I decided to go. (Step over Dr. Funke, you aren’t the only anal-rapist around) Looking back, I should have just let them gang rape me, for watching Transformers 2 is worse than being anally raped (not that I have been anally raped, but nothing could be more painful than watching Shia LaBeouf act) Well moving on from raping anuses, I would like to give some more details about why this movie was so bad that my butthole hurt afterward.

Warning: The next few paragraphs contain MANY SPOILERS (not that is matters since the script was most likely written by a retarded elk…ya try and imagine that)

The acting, wow the acting. It was just flat out bad, it’s like they just tried one take for every scene and just said, “Ya that’s good enough, we can just blow something up in the background to draw the attention away from actual dialogue.” Shia, what happened, you had such a promising career in front of you while Even Stevens was going on, and I guess we just now realized we only watched that show for Beans. While Shia’s acting leaves a lot to be desired, his character, Sam, does nothing special that anyone else couldn’t do. To be honest, I never saw the first Transformer movie, but you would think that they spend a whole movie with the Transformers before, and the only thing you learned how to do was just run? I don’t remember him ever destroying a single “bad” Transformer in this movie. The only reason he is involved is because he touched a piece of rock that made him see symbols that he doesn’t understand. If you’re going to be the main role in an action movie, you have to be badass in some way, but Sam is just a pussy who screams a lot and runs. Speaking of screaming, while Megan Fox is undeniably tasty, her role involves 2 things: be hot and scream “SAM!!” every 4 minutes. The little struggle that goes on between Shia and Foxy throughout the movie is that they won’t say “I Love You.” Wow, that is the most uninteresting couple problem ever and if you can’t say that you love Megan Fox then you are obviously a faggot.

Shia and Megan take up the two main roles while John Turturro and Ramon Rodriguez take supporting roles. Turturro is usually a very reliable actor, except maybe in Barton Fink which is unbelievably boring, and he performs his role to its mediocre limitation and don’t have a problem with his character too much except for the end when he decides that he needs to climb the pyramid on which the bad transformer is on. He radios to the US Army to shoot down the transformer which they eventually do but there is absolutely no reason for him to be climbing the pyramid, he could have just as easily radioed in from 10 miles away but Michael Bay decides that he needs a somewhat main character near a big explosion. (Quick little side note: I’m pretty sure there was not a 5 minute span in the movie where there wasn’t an explosion. Is there an Oscar for that?) Now on to the newly-named most annoying character in cinematic history (He gladly accepted the title from former title holder Jar Jar Binks): Ramon Rodriguez’s portrayal of Leo, Sam’s college roommate. “Like most college dorms, Leo for some reason has a huge room that has tv and computer screens everywhere, and while it may be moving-in day for the dorm, it looks like he’s been there a good 2 years. Leo, of course gets dragged into the whole Transformer mess and complains constantly about being shot at and screams and cries every time (which in a Michael Bay film is quite a lot.) While he cries and claims that he wants out of the car every 3 seconds, when Turturro is about to leave to perform an inexplicable climb up a pyramid, Leo says he wants to ride with him. Why wouldn’t the guy who won’t stop crying about danger want to go into the most dangerous area, just an obvious move right?

Everybody likes to watch random pieces of metal clash into each other and makes loud noises right? Cause that’s what every fight scene was when it was between 2 or more Transformers. Bay decided to shoot the fights up close so you had absolutely no idea who was hitting who and whether or not the good guys were winning which made me ask myself for 3rd time throughout the movie, “Do I even care?” Also just another random comment about the Transformers, why they hell do they have teeth? And do they have dental plans where they’re from? I guess you could call them all “metal mouths” HAHAHA Oh I make myself laugh. But ANYWAY, some fight scenes were hard to tell what the hell was going on and then 2 different driving scenes bothered me because they are all driving in the desert at one point with nothing around them but sand and then BAM they are in a city, no element of time passage was used, just BAM, we haven’t blow anything up in a while, lets get going. And then right after that, the cops are following them so they say to each other they need to get away from them and then BAM they are hiding in buildings throughout the city, no need to show us how the hell the got out of the car. I’m pretty sure Hayden Christensen wasn’t in there car and “jumped” them out.

Now to discuss the ending. Another little warning, MAJOR SPOILERS HERE (but once again, if you have the IQ of 12 or above you could figure out the ending.) Optimus Prime is killed earlier trying to save Sam and now Sam has to bring him back to life to defeat Megatron. So they have to find this key they could bring Prime back to life and this key is called the “matrix” seriously it is, obviously they ran out of imaginative names and just borrowed it from an amazing movie. (I don’t care if Transformers used the word before the movie came out but The Matrix is an awesome movie and Transformers blows and so ipso facto Transformers is gay) But ANYWAY back to the ending. Sam is blown up right before he gets to Prime (obviously) and he is lying there while Foxy screams “SAM!!” for the thousandth time. We now see Sam in what looks to be “Transformer Heaven” (at this point I am cackling like a hyena from Lion King its so ridiculous) and the other Primes tell him what he already knows, it’s his destiny and he has to save Optimus (actually I’m just guessing here because I couldn’t hear anything over my own laughter, but I’m pretty sure that sounds right.) Also the matrix is the key to blowing up the sun for the transformers to use as energy (the plot of the movie, and ya I just said the plot as an aside) So of course the Transformer named “The Fallen” puts the key into the machine to blow up the sun but it has to warm up like a 1950s TV so that, thank god, give Prime time to go blow it up and kill The Fallen and he may have killed Megatron but you can’t tell who the fuck is who and I didn’t care. And then lastly we see one of the bad Transformers hiding and not getting killed (which could have EASILY happened) to ensure a third installment.

Since there is obviously going to be another one, the second film of a good trilogy is supposed to basically have to bad guys win. See Star Wars. The title was supposed to fulfill that as well, but in the end the bad guys lose anyway and they just let a bad guy get away so they can have another movie. Classic Michael Bay: focus on explosions and waving of arms (preferably with flares in hands) and forget that you have to actually write dialogue and a script. O well, better luck next time and the next time and the next time because for some reason people love his shitty movies.

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Weekend Box Office Recap

Posted by Mac10 on June 16, 2009

  1. The Hangover – So I finally saw this last week. It may be time to start putting Todd Phillips name up there with Judd Apatow. With Old School and Starsky and Hutch (criminally underrated) already on the resume, this movie pushes his name to the top of the comedy list. Also, an underrated line in the movie that I didn’t catch until later in the movie was Zach Galifinakis discussing a movie with Ted Danson, Magnum PI, and the Jewish guy. He was talking about 3 Men and a Baby.
  2. Up – Every review I have read about this talks about the fat kid was an Asian-American. Maybe it’s because I think all fat people look alike, but I never noticed he was Asian. Also, I read some feminism crap complaining Pixar doesn’t make movies with female protagonists. Well, I sat through years of Disney making only female-led movies and that didn’t stop me from jerking off watching them.
  3. The Taking of Pelham 123 – I love Denzel as much as the next black woman, but I can’t really get fired up about this movie. It just looks like another Speed without the beautiful chemistry of Keanu and Sandra (arguably the greatest actor and actress of our time)*. Why couldn’t Denzel and Travolta switch roles? Give me badass Denzel (Training Day and American Gangster) over bad guy Travolta (Wild Hogs)**.
  4. Night at the Museum 2 – I actually went to go see this. It’s pretty much what you expect: an entertaining movie with a few funny scenes, but nothing you will remember or think about in a couple days. Plus, I called what would happen at the end of the movie which is always fun to get right. Don’t judge me for getting a confidence boost for correctly predicting the end of a kids movie.
  5. Land of the Lost – Will Ferrell is apparently in development on IMDB for Anchorman 2. Am I the only one who doesn’t want to see an Anchorman 2? The first one is undeniably great, but a sequel just seems unnecessary.
* Excepting Sir Nicolas Cage of course
** I have never seen this movie

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Weekend Box Office Recap

Posted by Mac10 on June 11, 2009

1..  The Hangover – Dr. Funke, my brother, and my co-workers have all seen this and told me it was amazing. Luckily, I don’t value any of their opinions so I don’t feel bad about having not seen this yet. If Zach Galifinakis is as good in this as he is interviewing stars Between the Ferns, then it might just be the greatest movie of all time.

2.. Up – Hey, a movie I have seen. Another amazing entry from Pixar has forced me to create a list (suck on it, Funke) ranking the Pixar movies.

a. Toy Story

b. Wall-E

c. Finding Nemo

d. Up

e. Monsters, Inc.

f. The Incredibles

g. Ratatouille

h. Toy Story 2

i. A Bug’s Life

j. Cars

3. Land of the Lost – Reading the critics reviews, I have ascertained that this is the worst movie ever. Even I didn’t want to see it after seeing the previews and I am a huge Will Ferrell fan. I think Will needs to make a couple non-Will Ferrell movies (Stranger than Fiction, Melinda and Melinda) to get the stench of this one off of him

4. Night at the Museum 2 – Never saw the first one, but I hear it wasn’t bad. This one is allegedly terrible, but I laugh everytime at the preview where Ben Stiller tells Jonah Hill he has seen things you can’t even imagine. The lesson: I am easily entertained.

5. Star Trek – Is JJ Abrams still involved with LOST or is it just a coincidence that this movie involved time travel as well? Anyway, with how financially and critically successful this movie was, I estimate the sequel to come out in about 2 weeks.

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Weekend Box Office Recap

Posted by Mac10 on May 19, 2009

Sorry to those loyal readers out there who tune in every Monday expecting a Weekend Box Office Recap and were devastated to be denied one yesterday. In fact, I haven’t posted anything since last Monday’s Recap. Don’t worry, readers, this delay was not caused by any productive reason such as a job or having friends, but rather from watching The Wire 24/7. Seriously, I’m on Season 4 and I’ve been watching it for a week. Anyways, on to the recap.

1. Angels and Demons – I’m actually going to see this tonight. I always thought this book was much better than The Da Vinci Code, and its plot translates much better for a movie. My only complaint is that they kept Tom Hanks instead of replacing him with Sir Nicolas Cage, Esquire. Any time you combine Sir Cage and secret cults (aka The Wicker Man), gloriousness ensues: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=KOpsbAUEe90

2. Star Trek – I really should start seeing these movies before I do the recaps. It would probably help. Anyway, I’ve heard mostly positive things about this movie from people whose movie opinions I respect. But I don’t know if I can see a movie starring Chris Pine without thinking he should be starring in a Brazzers video.

3. X-Men Origins: Wolverine – This movie actually has some good talent in terms of writing and directing. One wrote Swordfish (I especially liked the eloquent writing involved when Halle Berry was topless) and the other wrote 25th Hour and adapted The Kite Runner. The director wrote and directed Tsotsi, which is a badass foreign film that everyone should see. Even with these credentials plus my love for all things Australia plus my man crush on Taylor Kitsch, I still haven’t seen this movie. Once again, being poor trumps being interested.

4. Ghosts of Girlfriends Past – How is this still in the top 5? Didn’t all the whipped guys who have been forced to see this already see this opening weekend? There can’t be that many people who need to see Matthew Mc (I’m tired of looking up how to spell his last name) without his shirt on. Look it up online, you lonely whores.

5. Obsessed – Now that I’ve been watching The Wire, I feel like I can say WHAT THE FUCK IS STRINGER BELL DOING IN THIS PIECE OF SHIT? The man is Stringer Bell for fuck’s sake. He should only be offered roles in movies that are as badass as him. Whether a movie can be as badass as Stringer, I’ll leave that question to the philosophers.

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GO SEE STAR TREK

Posted by Voltairrible on May 13, 2009

Readers who are not Mac10 or Dr. Funke (D.D.S.),

GO AND SEE STAR TREK!

I went a few days ago, and I’m just now working my lazy ass around to writing a small review.  “Why a small review, Wudgles?  We love your witticisms, opinions, and photoshop skills!  Give us a review worthy of this movie and your time!”, you might say.  Truth of the matter is that I’ll leave the actual movie reviews to Mac10 and Dr. Funke, since they do a much better job and have a much larger breadth of meta material to reference for “lols.”

Also, it prevents me from giving away too much of the plot.

Anyway, the fact of the matter is that Star Trek is an extremely entertaining movie, both for Trekkies (who apparently find that term demeaning and prefer the term “Trekkers” [WTF is the difference?]) and non-virgins alike.  JJ Abrams did a great job with the film, and I can honestly say I wasn’t bored for a minute.  The film is more action oriented than its sci-fi roots, but the script still details the origin of the main characters without being boring.

Other highlights:

  • Good action scenes, both in and out of spacecraft
  • Leonard Nemoy
  • Vulcan mind meld
  • A busty ass chick painted green in lingerie
  • Explosions
  • Black holes
  • Simon Pegg doing a Scottish accent… as Scotty
  • “Set phasers to stun”

Trivia:   The guy who plays Dr. McCoy was also in Ghost Ship.  Amazing he got work after that film, right?

Wudgles’ “Inner Nerd” Rating Scale: 8.5 (Star Wars is better)

Picture Unrelated

Picture Unrelated

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Weekend Box-Office Recap

Posted by Mac10 on May 11, 2009

Since I am jobless and penniless, I am currently too poor to go see any movies. Luckily, that won’t stop me from commenting on the top 5 grossing movies of the weekend.

1. Star Trek – Not gonna lie, this looked pretty awesome. I have never seen any Star Trek movie/episode, but I do get a half-chubby from JJ Abrams so I might have to check this out. Plus, according to IMDB, it is the 62nd best movie of all time, so its got that going for it.

2.  X-Men Origins: Wolverine – I know that this got leaked and I could conceivably watch it online, but who wants to watch an action movie on their computer? I watch movies all the time for free on the computer, but only dramas and comedies. If you’re going to see a mindless action flick, do it in a theater where at least the graphics look cool. Unless it’s the new Transformers movie. Please do not see that and encourage studios to continue financing Michael Bay movies.

3. Ghosts of Girlfriends Past – I was really hoping this fell out of the top 5. I already used my good McConaughey joke last week. Anyway, if your girlfriend/gay lover is trying to force you to see this, try renting a different chick flick to assuage them. My recommendations: Definitely, Maybe (pretty standard chick flick but it has Ryan Reynolds so it can’t be bad) or Before Sunrise/Before Sunset.

4. Obsessed – Apparently, the main guy from this movie is from The Wire. I just rented Season 1 of The Wire so I expect my life to be soon taken over completely with watching it. Loyal readers can look forward to another timely TV show recap like my Sopranos post last summer.

5. 17 Again – I really have nothing to say about this movie. Instead, I will link you to a pretty great sketch from SNL two nights ago. After watching this, you should also check out the new digital short Timberlake and Samburg did as well. http://www.hulu.com/watch/72446/saturday-night-live-immigrant-tale

Posted in Movies, TV | Tagged: , , , , , | 1 Comment »

The Glorious Return Of: Weekend Box Office Recap

Posted by Mac10 on May 4, 2009

After a brutal school year filled with drinkin’ beers and bangin’ sluts (Editor’s note: sluts should read “a slut”), I am excited for a summer with no job, no money, and no friends in town. On that uplifting note, let’s get back to everyone’s favorite blog post. This is where I recap the top 5 grossing movies of the weekend without seeing them. Good times are had by all.

1. X-Men Origins: Wolverine  – This movie has some serious pros and cons. Pro: It includes the 2 best X-Men characters (Wolverine and Gambit) with certified bad-ass Taylor Kitsch (Tim Riggins from Friday Night Lights) as Gambit. Con: How am I supposed to take Hugh Jackman seriously as Wolverine after that incredibly gay one-man musical he performed at the Oscars? It will take a lot for me to lose respect for Australia, but Hugh Jackman’s performance put a dent in my belief that all Australians were sweet and in a frat.

2. Ghosts of Girlfriends Past – That’s what I love about Matthew McConaughey movies. I get older, they stay the same.

3. Obsessed – This movie joins Varsity Blues on the list of most unrealistic movies ever. In both movies, the lead guy turns down an opportunity to sleep with Ali Larter because they are in a relationship. I don’t care who you are or who you are with, if Ali Larter wants to sleep with you, then you aren’t going to say no.

4. 17 Again – Here’s a fun game: Go into this movie wearing nothing but a trench coat and sit next to a row of pre-teen girls and see how long it takes for you to be escorted from the theater. My record is 4 minutes 32 seconds.

5. Monsters vs. Aliens – Any animated movie not made by Pixar gets several dismissive wanking motions.

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Weekend Box Office Recap

Posted by Mac10 on August 18, 2008

If you’ve been reading my posts this week (and odds are, you haven’t been) then you know that I have been too busy watching the Olympics to see any movies. Luckily, this won’t stop me from reviewing them.

1. Tropic Thunder – As much as I like Robert Downey Jr., no white guy pretending to be a black guy will ever top C. Thomas Howell in Soul Man.

The only way I'm going to get into law school

The only way I'm going to get into law school

2. The Dark Knight – This really needs to leave the top 5. I am running out of things to say about it. This movie has spawned debate in some circles (namely: my weekly circle jerk group) over the attractiveness of Maggie Gyllenhaal. I argue that she has a subtle hotness about her. Others, like DrFunke, claim that she too closely resembles the Joker to be attractive. Feel free to comment on this post and let us know your thoughts on this very important debate.

3. Star Wars: The Clone Wars – I am a Star Wars nerd, and even I didn’t see this movie. So, how is it #3 in the box office? My only conclusion is that, for people like Wudgles, this movie is a perfect fusion of their 2 favorite things: Star Wars and anime porn.

4. Mirrors – How wasted was Kiefer Sutherland when he agreed to do this movie? I was intrigued, though, when two of the plot keywords on IMDB were Interracial Love and Remake of Korean Film. Those are usually 2 keywords I look for when browsing the internets for videos.

5. Pineapple Express – If you would like to read a review of this movie from someone who has actually seen it, please see DrFunke’s review. My advice is to only see this movie if you are a pothead, otherwise re-watch Superbad or Forgetting Sarah Marshall.

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Dual Movie Reviews: Pineapple Express Vs. Step Brothers

Posted by DrFunke on August 13, 2008

I'd be doing myself a disservice, and every member of this band, if I saw Pineapple Express.

I'd be doing myself a disservice, and every member of this band, if I saw Pineapple Express.

So as of now, it seems like there are going to be three big comedies this summer. Tropic Thunder comes out soon, and I have high hopes for that. The two that are already out would be Pineapple Express and Step Brothers. I’ve heard a lot of debating about which of the two is a better comedy, and I have to say, how is this even a question? PE was OK at best, and SB was as good as Talladega Nights though not as funny as Anchorman. Few movies are Anchorman funny though so it’s not fair to make that a knock on Step Brothers. People didn’t rip on Knocked Up for not being as funny as 40 Year-Old Virgin, so I don’t see why Ferrell movies get that treatment but the Apatow movies don’t. Anyway, I’m going to just go ahead and review these two side by side for your reading pleasure so you don’t make the same mistake I did and pay money to see Pineapple Express.

Pineapple Express
It should be abundantly clear to you at this point that I didn’t really like this movie. It wasn’t unwatchable or anything, but I only laughed out loud about 3 or 4 times, which was definitely disappointing. Now, there are two things I need to get off my chest. First, in official interviews for the movie, James Franco claimed that he didn’t smoke pot. Consider that. Then watch this video. After watching what may be the most unintentionally hilarious interview in MTV history, you might not believe that Franco doesn’t partake in some ganja every once in a while. Second, there are certain things that I really hate only because of their fan bases. Like the Yankees, because Yanks fans are 80% retarded front-runners posing as actual baseball fans. Like Dave Matthews Band, because his fans are all dudes from places like Nantucket and Park Avenue who wear popped-collared pastel-colored polos, talk about how much money mommy and daddy have, and say “brah” without a hint of irony. Dave’s voice, though, does sound like he’s groaning with his mouth full of food, and that’s annoying and makes his lyrics unintelligible. In a similar vein to DMB, Phish is annoying because people who enjoy it are generally too high to have ever actually listened to how boring it is and how shitty the songs and lyrics are, but still say it’s their favorite band because people who smoke weed like it because the band smokes weed, and weed automatically makes things cooler to idiots. I don’t mind people who smoke weed and are relaxed about it. If someone smokes but is still a normal dude, I’m cool with it. But if someone is a militant stoner (Fav. movie: Half Baked, fav. band: Phish, wears Birkenstocks and hemp bracelets, this is what I mean by militant.), I would fully support their legally sanctioned castration, because no one is more dull or stupid to listen to or just to be around, and pothead culture bothers me enough that I pray for a meteor to hit the Burning Man Festival every year. When potheads try to get philosophical, it’s generally as stupid and vague as a question asked by a 9/11 truther, and makes equally as upset that those people are viewed by the law as my equal.

Which brings me to Pineapple Express. If you go to the IMDb page for the movie and look at the message boards, you’ll find threads that start with the title “If Everyone in the World Smoked Weed…”, then has a body that reads “The world would be a much more peaceful place.” Really? That’s your post? People like that guy should be euthanized, or at least sterilized. I’m not kidding. Oh, and the movie itself was pretty boring, a few good laughs, the best of which were ruined by the previews for the most part. James Franco (plays Saul) is pretty funny, and Danny McBride (plays Red) has some pretty hilarious moments. Seth Rogen was alright, but he is kind of wearing on me though. He was priceless in 40 YOV, pretty good in Knocked Up, and had a couple great lines in Superbad. But I’m getting to the point where I find his mannerisms and way of speaking and (you guessed it) aggressive pot-headed-ness to be sort of annoying. And regardless the whole movie is basically just one joke played out in several scenarios and a few throw away one-liners. That joke being, “Hey, people are slower and stupider but sometimes in a kind of charming way when they’re high!” Using one joke didn’t work when they tried it in Chuck and Larry, and it didn’t really work here either.

Asians get made fun of a little in the movie, which is fine with me because good stereotype jokes are comfortable and funny. The plot of the movie makes sense, it’s basically just a comedy set within the plot of a standard action movie. I was a little confused by what they were trying to do with the action though. Sometimes the action scenes would be kind of over the top funny action, sometimes they would be really intense and kind of brutal, and sometimes they were painfully stupid and cliched. I feel like the director couldn’t make up his mind on what direction to take it in. Probably because he was high.

It wasn’t bad, but it definitely wasn’t good enough to pay to see. I didn’t go high, because that’s fucking stupid. “But everyone says it was funny high!” Everything is dipshit, why would this be different?

When the movie itself finished, the friend I was with just frowned, shrugged his shoulders, and disappointedly stated, “I mean, OK.” It wasn’t as bad as Wanted, which is surely the sign of the Judgment Day’s arrival. The movie’s annoying fans have managed to ruin some of the movie for me too, which is tough because I already left the theater disappointed. Final Grade: a generous C.

Step Brothers

Seeing as I enjoy laughing when I go to comedies, I found Step Brothers to be miles better than Express. One of the big knocks on the movie is that the plot is stupid, and all it does is just look for laughs. It’s a comedy, who gives a shit if the premise is that two 40 year old dudes still act like kids then basically just fuck around for an hour and a half? Comedy is kind of like porn in the sense that plot really doesn’t matter that much. People watch each of the two genres for one reason only. They watch comedy to laugh, and porn because this is America and if you don’t like it you can just get out. I’ll reference The Big Lebowski, when the Dude says, “He fixes the cable?” The plot means nothing, no one’s trying to win an award when they’re making a pure comedy. They do have porn awards though. Anyway, I don’t see the point of fucking around, and I like it when comedies make the jokes their priority.

And secondly, Airplane, one of the greatest comedies ever, had a massively retarded plot, and spent the entire time doing anything to get a laugh. If the plot being stupid bothers you, but enough that you don’t find this or this or this funny, then I’m sorry, but we can’t be friends. So honestly, when did lack of intricate plot turn into a bad thing for comedies? Does that really annoy people more than when Adam Sandler movies spend their last 15 minutes attempting to show you that the movie has an extremely generic message? (Examples of Sandler movie morals: “Being yourself is the only way to be truly happy” or “Being yourself is the only way to be truly happy.”)

Basically from start to finish, every scene with Brennan (Ferrell) and Dale (John C. Reilly) on screen together is absolutely hilarious. It starts at the first family dinner, with Dale coming back to a Brennan insult by saying, “Oh yeah. That joke is so funny, the last time I heard it I laughed so hard I fell off my dinosaur,” followed by Dale on the verge of tears for the next 15 seconds. After that, it never really looks back, except a slight lull towards the end of the movie which I won’t spoil for you. Honestly, the non-sports Ferrell comedies are all known quantities. (NASCAR isn’t a sport, so Ricky Bobby counts in the good Ferrell category.) You know what you’re getting when you go into them. There are always some side-splitting moments, and they are almost guaranteed to be as dumb as shit. Like the things they say immediately after waking up, or when they make the music video for their song “Boats N Hoes.”

Part of the fun of the movies though is a bit of a carry-over from Ferrell’s SNL days, when he would routinely crack up his co-stars on live TV. Since a lot of the lines in Step Brothers were improv, you can see that Ferrell and Reilly come dangerously close to making each other break out in laughter in pretty much every scene. I hadn’t laughed this hard at a movie since Superbad, and though Step Brothers was not quite as funny as that, it was still worth the money and had some moments that were among the funniest I’ve ever seen. The lines that sum up the movie for me are these two: “Oh God, it’s so slippery!” and “Oh my God that is so beautiful. What poem is that from, is that James Joyce?” Watch the movie with these in mind, and you’ll see that they basically sum up the movie’s essence. Incredibly stupid, and much much funnier for it.

Not the best comedy I’ve ever seen, but it was a lot of fun to watch. Highly recommended if you need a laugh: A-.

One of America's heroes, ridding the world of annoying hippies.

One of America's heroes, ridding the world of annoying hippies.

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