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Posts Tagged ‘dog poop’

Awesome TV Show Review: The 650LB Virgin

Posted by jeanclaudevandangles on July 13, 2009

Now right off the bat I just want to say that while this title is certainly nothing short of awesome, the show actually had some sad parts mixed in the unintentional comedy. The title itself is also somewhat deceptive since the dude is not actually 650 lbs. I would say that a more accurate title would be “The formerly really fat guy who know is a very average weight but who is way too socially awkward to ever get laid”. Anyway, the opening sequence was arguably the best part and it was like a preview for the movie Bruno in that it showed most of the funny parts in the preview and the feature presentation was more disgusting than anything. For example the preview had such wonderful stories like the time when the guy went for a goodnight kiss and ended up missing and kissing the poor girls eye. But then you get to the main show where he talks about how he has no friends because his first friend ever molested him. Awkward, and a real buzz kill. Don’t get me wrong, the show did contain plenty of hilarious moments, but it didn’t always follow the scientific premise that all fat people are jolly. One of my favorite parts when he went to this dating coach to help with his flirting, or as he likes to call it, “Flirt Camp”. While at “Flirt Camp”, his instructor asks him what he would rate himself on a Flirt Scale of 1-10 and his response is “I would rate myself a 5, but ultimately I would like to be a master jedi. Right now I think I’m only at Luke Skywalker level”. Really? Answers like this could perhaps be the reason you have trouble talking to women. Just a thought. At this same camp he was doing a sort of “Flirting Walkthrough” and was trying to seal the deal to get this chicks number. He elected to go with the classic, “How should I get in contact with you? Oh you have a phone? I have a phone too!”. While certainly a textbook line, I would have expected him to come up with something better seeing as he pretty much didn’t leave his house from the ages of 17-30. In all that time, and in all the TV that he most certainly watched, was there really no better line that he saw used? Anyway, the moral of the story is that this guy was a huge morale booster, since his slump is like a million times longer than mine and I am at least a 6 on the flirting scale. In closing, I wanted to point out that at one point he said that the worst thing ever thrown at him in high school was dog poop and that it made him feel a lot like garbage. Interestingly enough dude I don’t think even garbage gets dog poop thrown at it. So, yeah that really sucks…

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